There's a group on Facebook that asks Are You Harry-Von Turbo Pussers? Pussers is another term for Royal Marine/Royal Marine stuff (such as pussers kit). The group contains the following list (which I've posted without editing):
You Know You Are Too Pussers When...
• You still tell your parents/wife/girlfriend/cousin/civvie mates etc to ‘get the wets on’
• You have 'life on the Ocean Wave' as your mobile ring tone
• You have the globe and laurel as your screensaver
• It annoyed you that I didn’t use a capital ‘G’ and ‘L’ in the previous line
• You have a year round tan that runs from your hands to mid-arm and makes a nice ‘v’ on your chest
• You can use the creases on your T-shirt to shave with
• You A4 your civvies clothes. Ever. Even as a joke
• You have more than one pussers tattoo
• You hate seeing students wearing DPM jackets about town and say its because it’s split rig
• But really its because they have a button missing/the hood rolled down
• In work your even your bessie oppo won’t leave his rifle loafing with you because he knows you’ll pick him up for some dirt on it (when you strip it down behind his back)
• People actually suggest you should be a PW2/DL2 or on a training team
• You think that’s a good idea
• You still think Silver Shadows are the best trainer ever
• You go for a drink with your civvie mates and proceed to explain and demonstrate to them the subtleties of CQB (tap, tap, weapon sweep, eye thump, tango down, marking, standing...)
• Then you make them practise it
• You’re idea of a serious relationship involves an Arbers/Taunton/Plymouth chick
• You know the best runs ashore in at least 5 of the following, Exemouth, Taunton, Plymouth, Arbroath, Helensburgh, Barnstable, Watford, Oakhampton, Dubai
• You continually use phrases like “pound to a piece of shit”
• When faced with poor reception on your mobile phone or incoherent talkers you say “say again, over”
• Then finish your phone call with “roger, out”
• You own at least 4 books about the Royal Marines (SAS/Andy McChad books don’t count)
• When you came on Facebook you searched for every Royal Marine group/profile
• And joined most of them
• You would stop having sex if Cockleshell heros came on TV halfway through
• During sex, you mentally name all the parts to a GPMG from the Muzzle flash eliminator all the way back to the Rear sling loop to stop yourself coming too quick
• This actually has the opposite effect
• You know what film the quote “fuck off you spic bastards” is from
• At any EVERY family occasion (wedding birthday christening etc) you end up getting drunk because one relative knows about the TTQ (to the Queen) rule and knows you will uphold it
• After you get drunk you then proceed to announce to all your relatives that you ‘are turbo shiters’
• Then call a naked bar
• And actually do it
- Hate Pongos, Matelots, Crabs, Rubbers, STABS, cadets, students, civvies and generally anyone who isnt a bootneck or a female.
Not surprisingly, Royal is harry von turbo pussers. Gotta love it!
By the way, my favorite 'harry von' is harry von red pigs! I get to use it a lot in Texas...
Also, if you have any questions about what the heck any of the above means - leave it in the comments!
• You have the globe and laurel as your screensaver
• It annoyed you that I didn’t use a capital ‘G’ and ‘L’ in the previous line
• You have a year round tan that runs from your hands to mid-arm and makes a nice ‘v’ on your chest
• You can use the creases on your T-shirt to shave with
• You A4 your civvies clothes. Ever. Even as a joke
• You have more than one pussers tattoo
• You hate seeing students wearing DPM jackets about town and say its because it’s split rig
• But really its because they have a button missing/the hood rolled down
• In work your even your bessie oppo won’t leave his rifle loafing with you because he knows you’ll pick him up for some dirt on it (when you strip it down behind his back)
• People actually suggest you should be a PW2/DL2 or on a training team
• You think that’s a good idea
• You still think Silver Shadows are the best trainer ever
• You go for a drink with your civvie mates and proceed to explain and demonstrate to them the subtleties of CQB (tap, tap, weapon sweep, eye thump, tango down, marking, standing...)
• Then you make them practise it
• You’re idea of a serious relationship involves an Arbers/Taunton/Plymouth chick
• You know the best runs ashore in at least 5 of the following, Exemouth, Taunton, Plymouth, Arbroath, Helensburgh, Barnstable, Watford, Oakhampton, Dubai
• You continually use phrases like “pound to a piece of shit”
• When faced with poor reception on your mobile phone or incoherent talkers you say “say again, over”
• Then finish your phone call with “roger, out”
• You own at least 4 books about the Royal Marines (SAS/Andy McChad books don’t count)
• When you came on Facebook you searched for every Royal Marine group/profile
• And joined most of them
• You would stop having sex if Cockleshell heros came on TV halfway through
• During sex, you mentally name all the parts to a GPMG from the Muzzle flash eliminator all the way back to the Rear sling loop to stop yourself coming too quick
• This actually has the opposite effect
• You know what film the quote “fuck off you spic bastards” is from
• At any EVERY family occasion (wedding birthday christening etc) you end up getting drunk because one relative knows about the TTQ (to the Queen) rule and knows you will uphold it
• After you get drunk you then proceed to announce to all your relatives that you ‘are turbo shiters’
• Then call a naked bar
• And actually do it
- Hate Pongos, Matelots, Crabs, Rubbers, STABS, cadets, students, civvies and generally anyone who isnt a bootneck or a female.
Not surprisingly, Royal is harry von turbo pussers. Gotta love it!
By the way, my favorite 'harry von' is harry von red pigs! I get to use it a lot in Texas...
Also, if you have any questions about what the heck any of the above means - leave it in the comments!
I recognised some of the names:)
Posted by: Pat | August 28, 2009 at 09:18 AM
Yay! My work here is (almost) done - haha.
Posted by: Kath | August 30, 2009 at 05:48 PM
I'm a bootneck and you've got these SPOT ON! l was in stitches reading these!
TUP THREE!
Posted by: John Stevenson | November 29, 2010 at 06:31 AM
Hi John! Glad you liked 'em :-) Thanks for stopping by!
Posted by: Kath | December 07, 2010 at 02:45 PM
The antonym to "harry von red pigs" is "harry von ice bats"
Posted by: Tom | November 02, 2011 at 08:57 AM